Little Helpers
01/01/2009
Kids love the comfort of a routine, and completing daily, age-appropriate household tasks is part of that stability. “Establishing routines helps parents develop long-term benefits in their families, including security, a calmer atmosphere, trust and life skills for children,” says Lynn Lott, a marriage and family therapist and author of 18 books, including Chores Without Wars.
Advice that works from experienced moms and dads:
“We play a weekly game called 10 Things From the Closet. My son pulls out 10 different things that can be thrown away or donated. The items are usually very small—a lone playing card or a bendable figure—but it teaches him to get rid of things he’s lost interest in or give nice toys to someone less fortunate.” —Karen B., mother of 2, Royal Oak, MI
“We make it fun. We shoot baskets into the laundry hamper. We have a motto, “Clean up before you move on,” which helps keep messes from getting too big.” —Kathleen M., mother of 1, Pacific Palisades, CA
“We tie chores to an allowance, and give each child tasks they can understand and complete. My second grader is responsible for feeding the dogs twice a day and setting the table for dinner. Each child is paid based on age, and each year we look at a “raise” by analyzing job duties.” —Jeremy S., father of 2, Crested Butte, CO
“Don’t underestimate your kids. They are capable of much more if you give them a chance. We make checklists for my kids, and they love the responsibility and checking things off. My 5-year-old always asks for her list, and I include fun things too: Tell your brother you love him. Read a book. Play with the puppy.” —Jodi E., mother of 2, St. Paul, MN
“Give them chores they can physically perform, and don’t expect perfection. Bed corners won’t be tucked in tight, but praise the job and find something right about it.” —Kelly S., mother of 7, Boca Raton, FL
Simple weekly to-do lists instill coping skills for growing-up years, says Lott: “Children focus on the needs of the situation: doing what needs to be done because it needs to be done. They learn to be responsible for their own behavior, to feel capable and to cooperate in the family.”